Bangkok dangerous! Don't try this at home...

As an expat and woman in Bangkok I am in danger all the time...or so most people I talk to, who have not been here, seem to think. They often say things like: "Aren't you scared? Isn't Bangkok dangerous for women?" Most of these ideas come from something they may have glimpsed on the news or some report on the internet that highlighted some danger. Yes, we have had multiple coup d'etats here in the last 6 years, and certainly people died. We've also had floods, and more people died or their homes were ruined. People get killed here just as they do in the USA, Europe or Canada.

That does not stop most people from living a very enjoyable life here on a daily basis, and creating businesses in this thriving, bustling metropolis. 

In fact, I feel safer here than in many other countries. For one, with nearly 15 million people in this city, there are always people around. There are very few dark alleys for evil to lurk, most streets are brightly lit, with people out and about, eating on the street, socialising any night of the week. Thais are generally polite and happy to help if you ask for it. 

So when I hear that question, 'Aren't you scared?" about living and working overseas here in Asia, I wonder if it is not because the person asking it is maybe scared. Scared of unknowns, or scared of being out of their own comfort zone. It is easy to pass on an opportunity because it "may be dangerous" or "it wouldn't work anyway", or "I could never do/complete/succeed in that".  I let myself fall victim to that train of thought sometimes too. It is safe and easy. Comfortable like a well-worn blanket. 

Not your average commute to work...

But lately I've been doing a lot of reading about productivity, efficiency and challenging yourself. So I try to shrug off that security blanket sometimes and push myself beyond my comfort level. 

Because when you think about it, when are you really the happiest? 

It is when you are safely on the couch, watching that TV show, eating the same few rotated dinners, going on holiday to the same old places year in, year out? 

Or is it that time when you threw caution to the wind and went on that zip line adventure, or that time when you tried sushi and found out you loved raw fish after all? Or when you went cycling through the Masai Mara, and ended crashing upside down in an aardvark hole with scratches and bruises all over, but was not that one of the highlights of the trip? 

When do you feel the most alive? Tim Ferriss' book, The 4-Hour Workweek suggests that the opposite of happiness is not sadness but boredom, and that therefore excitement equates to happiness. For me, I think that's what makes me love being my own boss as well as living in another country. It forces me to get outside my comfort zone sometimes, simply because I've either never done it before, or I've never been there before. And guess what? Most times, I don't die, I don't actually fail miserably, or horribly embarrass myself. In most cases, the worst case scenario is just a good laugh at yourself. I think you'll find the same thing for you. 

Try a new dish every week...?

So why not give yourself a challenge? Perhaps start small: Eat something completely new, once a week. (Eating children only recommended for fictional characters.)

Or check out this Failure Games app, which gives you challenges and 24 hours to complete each. Today's challenge: Ask a friend to write down 3 things you can improve upon, then take a photo of the list (you have to submit the proof; you're held accountable!). 

In stead of re-booking last year's all-inclusive getaway, you could throw a dart at a map and go on a road trip holiday there. Imagine if you got lost! Would it really be so bad? 

There are lots of ways to challenge yourself. If you're getting a queazy feeling in your gut, you're doing it right! 

Hopefully this post inspired you to take a step outside your comfort zone and challenge yourself. If it did, or if you have other ideas and suggestions, please share it in the comments!

Happy Halloween everyone! Spook on! 

Cristel

Your Senzu Style Insider.  

Is procrastination a human condition?

The procrastination blog post, which I’ll write....tomorrow?

procrastinate
verb

To delay, put off doing something, postpone action, defer action, be dilatory, use delaying tactics, stall, temporize, play for time, play a waiting game, dally, drag one's feet/heels, take one's time; hesitate, vacillate, dither, be indecisive, be undecided, waver; Brit. haver, hum and haw; Scottish swither; informal dilly-dally, shilly-shally. 


According to my Thesaurus, there are many words/actions to describe delaying doing something. Even with calendars, reminder apps and sticky notes, inevitably I end up procrastinating certain things all the time. Unpleasant phone calls for example, certain accounting tasks, even this blog sometimes falls victim to my procrastination, unfortunately. Not because I don’t like doing it; I love it! So why then? 

Well, that same dictionary consulted earlier states: “fear of failure is often the reason why people procrastinate”. But research shows that’s not always the case. Other reasons for procrastination (plus how you could overcome them) are:

• You perceive the job or task at hand to be unpleasant, and you’re trying to avoid having to do it. Oftentimes you’re better off just getting it done and over with, so you can continue with things you enjoy more, or with more pleasant/fun aspects of the task. Like ripping off a bandage: quicker is less painful! Also, many procrastinators overestimate the unpleasantness of a task, but many times, in hindsight, you find it was not nearly as unpleasant as you had thought.

• You may be disorganised. More organised people are better able to prioritize tasks and schedule them in order of urgency or importance, and because they have prioritized to-do lists that cut the task down to manageable blocks of time, they don’t get caught with tasks overdue and avoid the stress that comes with being late to deliver. 

• Even though you are organized, you may feel overwhelmed by the task or job at hand. Maybe you have doubts whether you have the skills or resources to complete the job, so you delay getting started on it and spend your time on other, less important things in stead. But if that job you’re procrastinating on is important, it won’t just go away. So start with the parts of the task that you do feel confident about, and that you know you can complete succesfully. You’ll often find that once you’ve started, the rest will come too. Make a realistic schedule, taking into consideration the time needed to complete each segment, and stick to it. If needed, ask for help from people you know have the knowledge, and you’ll expand yours. There is no shame in learning along the way! 

• You may also fear success as much as failure. For example, you may worry that success at this task will lead to you being overwhelmed with more requests to do this type of task, or that you’ll be pushed to take on things that you feel are beyond you. Surprisingly, perfectionists are often procrastinators, as they tend to think "I don't have the right skills or resources to do this perfectly now, so I won't do it at all." Focus on one task at a time. Also look at all the potential outcomes: what's the worst that could happen? In many cases, reality is unlikely to be that bad! Learn to think more positively: it is a powerful tool to build your self-confidence and neutralise self-sabotage. If all else fails, have your Plan B ready, beforehand. No matter whether the outcome means success or failure (which is in the eye of the beholder and subjective to begin with), you are ready to deal with it. 

• One last reason for procrastination could be because you have an inability to decide. You just can’t make up your mind what to do, so you delay the decision, in fear of making the wrong choice. If you are really torn between your options, and your gut feeling is also not helping you, check out this guide from Mind Tools to help you develop decision-making techniques. 

Are you a procrastinator? If the answer does not come to you immediately, you can try this procrastinator self test. 

What's the most outrageous 'reason' you've ever given yourself to delay something you did not want to do? Share in the comments below. 

Have you ever used some of these ‘reasons’ to delay doing a task or job? There are a million of them, to be sure, these are just a few:

• Filling your day with low priority tasks from your To Do List (laundry, making a grocery list, organising your closet, etc.).
• Reading e-mails several times without starting work on them or deciding what you’re going to do with them.
• Sitting down to start a high-priority task, and almost immediately going off to make a cup of coffee (“I’ll get coffee now, that way I’m ready to sit down and work without interruption later.”).
• Leaving an item on your To Do list for a long time, even though you know it's important.
• Regularly saying "Yes" to unimportant tasks that others ask you to do, and filling your time with these instead of getting on with the important tasks already on your list (“Sure, I’ll help you sort your filing system!”.
• Waiting for the “right mood” or the “right time” to tackle the important task at hand (“I’ll start my work-out routine tomorrow, I don’t feel in the mood to work out right now”).

I know I have on occasion used one or more of these ‘reasons’ to delay an important phone call (“I’ll call later, when they’re back from lunch”), a confrontation with a staff member (“I have to check my emails and update the Facebook page first before I reprimand So-and-So for coming in late again.”) or yes, even writing of this blog (“I need a few hours to write and I have no inspiration right now”). 

Personally, I’ve found that making to-do lists that indicate priority helped me a lot. There are a lot of Apps out there that can also help with this, and Apple’s Calendar has built-in reminders that  you can set, as well as a Reminders app. Those are the ones I use the most, you may have your own favourites, please share them in the comments below? 

Another method that works well for me is to reward myself with something fun, once I’ve done the task I’ve been procrastinating. For example: complete a blog post, then I can go play tennis! Or update my jewelry sales spreadsheets, then spend a while (a.k.a. two hours) on Pinterest or Facebook :-)

In any case, most experts agree that procrastination is a deeply ingrained habit and is not easily broken. Like any habit (good or bad), it takes a long time to develop or break, so you should not expect results overnight. 

But if you tackle procrastination at every encounter, you’ll find that over time, you start recognising when you’re procrastinating and as soon as you do, you have an opportunity to identify why you’re procrastinating and and take the appropriate steps or actions to overcome the block. 

Well, I am off to play some tennis! ;-) But when I come back, I’d love to read your comments, your personal experiences and your suggestions! Thanks in advance for sharing.

Your Style Insider,

Cristel
Thanks go to www.mindtools.com for much of this post's background research. 

How To Work this Summer's all-white Trend!

This spring and summer a lot of awesome trends are hot (hopefully the weather will follow!). Today we’ll focus how to make the white-on-white trend work for you. It is easy to look fabulous in white! Here’s our Top 10 Tips on how to rock the white fashion trend this summer:


10. White is not boring! White looks great on all skin tones, and any outfit that’s all one colour will make you look leaner. 
9. Silhouettes on the shade. The white trend follows this year’s silhouette guidelines; soft fabrics, feminine shapes and flowing lines. A-line skirts, maxi dresses, flare pants, peasant shirts, linens and ultra-soft cottons are all joining the party. Layering is done without adding bulk; if you go wide on the bottom, then keep the top more fitted, and vice versa.

8. It’s not all white! Whites and soft creams or off-whites can go together. Just try to keep it to one or two tones max, or it will look mismatched. 
7. Casual of Dressy? Either one goes; a white Jackie-O style sundress with white scarf or jacket, white pantsuit, white cargo capris with a white peasant shirt or t-shirt, the trend works both for the office and weekend relaxed. 
6. Nights in white satin? The white trend will carry you from daytime into the evening hours seamlessly. To dress white up more in the evenings, minimalistic lines work well at night and try wearing it with more jewelry or sparkling accessories, or change up footwear from ballerinas to wedges.  
5. White hair? The white fashion trend looks awesome with any hair color, just as it goes nicely with any skin color. Wear hair up or down, short of long, up to you. A small hair accessory like a hair slide or clip always dresses up any outfit. 
4. Keep an eye out! You don’t want to create too much of a contrast by distracting from with your all-white outfit with heavily made up eyes. The trend emphasizes natural colors and tones, so soft pinks, beiges and complimenting tones will make you look radiant in white. Soft tones in lipstick or a glossy lip balm are both great options for lips.
3. Show your heels. This summer the trend is heavy on ballarinas, strappy sandals, wedges and natural leather tones. To lengthen your silhouette, go with matching colours (whites) or skin tone neutrals on your tootsies. If your shoes are open, consider a French Pedicure for pretty, match-the-trend nails. 
2. Belt it out! For a more dressy look, go with a thinner fitted belt that either blends with your all-white  outfit or for a bolder look, pick a very bright orange, pink, green or navy colour. The casual, all-white look is best done with a loosely worn, wider, natural toned belt that is slung low on the hips. Great with cargo pants and a peasant shirt or longer t-shirt. 
1. Accessorize white on white too! Senzu has a great range of natural jewelry, necklaces with white pendants, pearls, white Swarovski crystals, silver jewelry that will compliment your all-white outfit. 


Check out these all-white lookbooks we’ve put together to give you inspiration. The angelic models and all-white fashion courtesy of Victoria’s Secret (all rights reserved), all jewelry by Senzu. 


Let us know what you think of this trend? 
Your Senzu Style Insider,


Cristel